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Sh. Yasir Qadhi on “Dealing with Homosexual Urges” April 14, 2009

Posted by Rasheed Eldin in Advice, Shari'ah.
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Please see this excellent article by Yasir Qadhi over at Muslim Matters:
Dealing With Homosexual Urges: Yasir Qadhi to Muslim Student

I excerpt this core part for you:

In our religion,  the discussion of whether these urges are because of ‘Nature’ or ‘nurture’ is really quite irrelevant. And by this I do not mean that we don’t have an answer to this question. As Muslims, we believe that the fitrah that Allah created us upon is that, in terms of sexuality at least, opposites attract. But it is possible that some people have corrupted this fitrah themselves, or it has been corrupted by external methods. And it cannot even be ruled out that for some, the change in this fitrah is beyond their control.

But the point  is – and that is why I say the question is irrelevant to the Shar’i ruling –  even if somebody has such urges, it does not justify them acting upon it. Rather, what we can say to those who feel attracted to the same gender is that having such urges and conquering them is a part of the test Allah has given them. Each one of us is tried in different ways, and merely wanting to do an act is not justification enough to carry it out. [...]

I say that I’m attracted to women. Does that legitimize going after every woman I’m attracted to? Of course not. We all have our desires and urges and we must all battle them. So if you experience urges that are unnatural, you must battle them, and without doubt Allah will reward you for that.

Another point to realize is that the urge, in and of itself, is not sinful. It is simply a desire, and desires are beyond our control, hence we are not accountable for them. But to allow such feelings to persist without trying to control them is problematic. In any case, the urge in and of itself is not sinful, acting on the urge is what incurs sin. As long as the desire remains in the realm of feeling, you are not accountable on the Day of Judgment, but the second that this desire is manifested in a physical action, you are liable for all that follows.

Lastly, even if you have acted upon this urge – and we seek Allah’s refuge from this – know that this would constitute a sin. Yes, a major sin, and one that most people would be disgusted by, but realize that it is a sin alone and not kufr. Hence, even acting upon it and committing a major sin does not expel you from the fold of Islam. However, to stand up and justify it, or defend it, or write articles claiming that it is Islamic, without a doubt constitutes kufr, and not merely sin.

I would like to thank the Sheikh for discussing this issue openly, at a time when more of the “Queer Muslim” groups are springing up and promoting their unjustifiable views.

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Comments»

1. Rasheed Eldin - April 15, 2009

The article has inspired quite a flurry of comments, and people from StraightWay have contributed to the discussion. I noticed some critical points made regarding setting up a support group like StraightStruggle, so I chipped in with my thoughts:

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I would just like to comment on two points that have been made in recent comments:

1. That this issue should not be talked about too much!

– I agree, these matters shouldn’t be exaggerated as we could run the risk of actually putting the wrong ideas in some people’s heads. But there certainly has to be *somewhere* to talk about it openly, as hiding from the issue won’t make it go away. Yes you’re right, what’s needed first and foremost is an emphasis on spirituality and returning to Allah. But who’s going to make that link for the people struggling? And not only that, but there are plenty of good practising Muslims for whom this problem hasn’t yet gone away because there are other dimensions to the problem: psychological, social, whatever. The implication that people feel this way because they have been sinful is unfair.

– Also, linking it to “making sins public” isn’t right because it is already very public and what’s needed is another side to the discourse. There have been numerous books, documentaries and even a feature film (”A Jihad for Love”) promoting the “Queer Muslim” agenda and there must be some counter-balance. Furthermore, those who seek help by getting involved in some kind of support group generally do so anonymously, so they can talk through their issues without exposing what Allah has covered.

2. That setting up support groups is counter-productive!

– Perhaps you think that people involved in such groups just perpetuate their problems by becoming obsessed with them and talking about them incessantly. That’s a danger that people at StraightStruggle try to avoid, by encouraging members to look at their lives positively. At the same time, when things get tough, they know they have understanding brothers and sisters to lean on, who will talk them through their moment of struggle. And it means a lot coming from people who have gone through exactly the same.

2. jamal - April 10, 2012

I think is very possible to control the the acting on the homosexual urges.i believe homosexuality is just a misguided sense of feelings, is not by birth, by feeding the mind with porn and images of sexual contents, your mind wonder and when that happens we have access to even more demaging sites.i had urges i act up on it, i slept with men but i knew it was wrong and unnatural, i made a very concupiscence decision to stop swing pictures of nude man on Craig’s list and now I’m focused only on women and i will get married.sexuality is on your mind.i never kissed a man i was only attracted to penis but ever time i felt guilty, i stated by using men as women and later i was being used as a woman, i find it to be unnatural and wrong so i decided never do it again, because a man was created to be a man and a woman created to satisfy him.today no matter what thoughts comes to mind, i stick to the fact that i was created to be a man, i can not use a man as a woman and i can not let a man use me as a woman, is just a trick of the mind for us to betray our desires and go to the unnatural, this is very old practice, the Greeks did, the Turks, the Italians the Egyptians thousand years ago, in the west is worse because the psychology’s doctors who like the practice such sold the idea that people are born like that, is not i wasn’t i tried because pervettion of my mind and I’m finally out of it.

3. Fatima - April 13, 2013

assalaam alaikum,
brother, I think that with time and effort you might even get off the porn. I used to read racy novels once in a while, the kind called `romance novels which have graphic descriptions of sex and gave it up, never to read such trash again, In Sha Allah. No, never, may Allah help me! For you it is essential to avoid porn totally to keep happiness in your marriage


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